A Dip in the Sidewalk

So, I was going to write this post about how well things are going. How much things have changed since my life settled down and the new medication actually worked.  How I spent some time going through the blogs of others and found such inspiration.  I was going to write about change and, at the same time, change the layout of The Jogging Clydesdale as a some sort of symbolic representation of this "change".

I was going to, but then I wrote this one.

Today has been tough.  The girls had friends over last night and most of today. There was pizza. There was chips. And dip.  Did I mention the dip? And there was chips.  And doughnuts. And Bismarcks with cream filling. And I ate myself sick.  I am literally nauseous right now, tasting the burps of bbq potato chips. And dip.

Please tell me I'm not the only one to sweep a finger along the bottom and sides of a mostly empty chip dip container to get the last teaspoon of that sour cream goodness.  Please?

So, today wasn't a good day.

But this much has changed.

I am depressed this evening about my choices. But I'm not ashamed.  I know that I am human and can take only so much temptation. And dip.

I'm walking again, 2-3 times a week. And I'm trying to use the stationary bike the nights I don't walk.  And I did visit so many of the blogs I used to read for inspiration but had gotten out of the habit once my depression had really set in.  I am inspired by so many people who have walked down this road before.

I can feel a change just around the corner.

Today I've merely stumbled on a crack in the sidewalk.

And landed in the dip.