Don't rightly know what to say about last evening's run except to say it was hot, humid and there were hills. We went to a county park to run on the trails and it was a real treat. I had no idea about the hills we were going to encounter so Mrs. Clydesdale and I got a real workout. Even still, I was quite pleased with myself for pushing through and sticking to the C25K regimen.
I'll also say that, for all my talk about negative self talk and whatnot, it is equally true that one must listen to one's body as well as quiet the doubting mind. We got home, showered and I started making my supper. And within the space of about 5 minutes my mood went from jubilant to downright angry. The clutter made me angry. The ice cube I stepped on made me angry. The full trash can made me angry. And it was like I was standing outside myself, aware that the mood I had turned was not right, but not really able to reel it back in. I had let my sugar drop too far. It had been, by that time, 8 hours since I last ate and I had pushed hard in 92 degree weather and high humidity.
Does that excuse my behavior and the stress my wife endured while I regained control? No. It explains it, but that's all. I did recognize it for what it was, took a anti-anxiety med prescribed for exactly those moods and I ate. About an half hour after finishing my meal, I did feel much better. And then I made up with my wife.
This whole mind, body thing is so mysterious to me. I'm the kind of guy who practically lives in his thoughts, oblivious to his body. That's partly how I got into the unhealthy condition I'm in. That's been part of relearning health and diet. I need to remember that, while do have an unhealthy emotional connection with food, not having food is equally as damaging to my emotions.
Ah yes! This is familiar. I've learned with my husband that when I ask him if he's hungry and he says, "A little," that I'd better get food made quickly, because the time it's made, he's ravenous. There are times when I am snappish and short with everyone, and he asks, "Did you eat any lunch?" And it turns out that I didn't.
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